I spent the next two weeks furiously lesson planning for my own babies, Henderson babies, and Nashville babies, on top of trying to pull together a last-minute field trip. It was a crazy two weeks, and in the stress of it all, I began to doubt my decision. I know now it was a reaction to the stress and not a reflection of my true feelings, but at the time I was so consumed by "stuff" I had to do that I was ready to give up. There was one particular moment when I sat down in front of my roommate and said, "I can't do it."
My flight was booked for a Sunday-Monday visit to the school in Nashville. A "visit" also includes teaching a sample lesson, and I was terrified. Come visit me in my element, in my own classroom, and I have no fears. I love having visitors, especially since (for the most part) my kids love showing off for visitors. But throw me into a situation with so many unknowns and, well....watch me squirm. I spent my days working at school, then hours a night working on my sample lesson, stressing over how to make it perfect. Long story short, the Friday before I was supposed to leave for Nashville, my objective changed and my lesson was no longer relevant. For about 15 seconds, I was frustrated and felt defeated. And then I realized, hey, this means they'll have to cut me some slack, since they only gave me 2 days to plan a lesson! Even though I felt a little nervous about the sudden change, I couldn't shake the feeling that this would actually somehow benefit me.
I left for Nashville early Sunday morning, and one of my good friends from college and her husband picked me up at the airport. We spent the afternoon seeing the city--eating at a local restaurant, walking their new puppy around Centennial Park, and taking the grand tour of downtown. They were even sweet enough to run me to Target to get a few last minute supplies that I could not take on the plane. That evening, I met the principal, one of the math teachers, and the director of operations in East Nashville, right near the school, for dinner. I was nervous and a bit out of my element, but I enjoyed the conversation and a chance to meet some of the team members before my sample lesson the next day.
Monday morning, I took a cab over to the school and prepared for the day. From the moment I entered the school building, i was overwhelmed with excitement and awe. It's a small building, with only 4 classrooms, but it was warm and efficient. It was obvious from first glance that everything was incredibly organized. What I saw the rest of the time I was there only confirmed the awesomeness of the school.
I started the morning observing their advisory time, which is a chance for students to eat breakfast, get their stuff organized, and turn in their homework from the previous night. I was shocked by how self-sufficient the kids were, and how they monitored their own behavior with little direction from the teachers. By 8:10, I was on stage. My first run through of the lesson went horribly--I totally misjudged how long it would take me to teach the lesson, and the kids only had a few minutes to practice the skills on their own. The principal offered me some very honest and very constructive criticism, allowed me some time to reflect, and then asked me to go back in and teach it again to the next group. I felt much more confident the second time around, both with her guidance and my own reflections, and did a million times better. I got positive feedback from the principal, but it was hard to tell if I redeemed myself enough to be in the running. I spent the rest of the day observing other teachers and the procedures of the school, and by 12:00 was back in a cab on my way to the airport. I had fallen in love with the school and the kids, but I wasn't convinced that I had done enough to prove that I was up for the job.
That Friday, a colleague and I took 26 kids to NCCU and UNC Chapel Hill for a field trip. We had an absolute blast, and it was a beautiful day...a great way to round out a very busy week. The weekend came, and I was back to planning for my second sample lesson. The principal from Henderson was coming out to observe me on Tuesday, and then I was teaching out at Henderson on Friday. Another busy week ahead, another restless weekend.
Tuesday came and went quickly. I felt great about my observation - my kids were on point, as they usually are when they see a visitor they can impress, and a little bump in the schedule only gave me a chance to prove that I am flexible and can work under pressure. The principal left me a note complementing our classroom culture and my teaching personality/flexibility, and I knew I had done much better than my lesson in Nashville.
Wednesday afternoon, as I was driving home from work, I got a call from a 615 phone number. Immediately my heart jumped - Nashville! I answered the phone only to hear the principal from the charter school tell me she had spoken to my references, they confirmed what she thought about me from my interview, and she was hoping that I would join the team at their school. As soon as I hung up the phone, I screamed at the top of my lungs. I had a job - in Nashville! - if I wanted it. I was not "stuck" anymore. But I still had another interview to worry about.
Friday came around, and the process at Henderson was similar. Teaching a lesson, feedback from the principal, teaching another lesson, then observing. At the end of the school day, I had what would be considered a formal interview, except that it took place at Denny's, so I would say it was a bit more informal. After the questions he asked me, I wasn't convinced that I was what he was looking for (something I've learned through this process--interviewing is NOT my strength. I spend a lot of time talking in circles and trying to spit my words out). But on our drive back to the school, I mentioned that I had another offer on the table, and the mood shifted. When we settled back into his "office", he offered me the job on the spot.
Both positions that I've been offered are for 6th grade math. I would be a founding teacher at both. The salary of one is about $10,000 more than the other. One is in rural North Carolina, the other is in the heart of Nashville. Both are most if not all TFA alum and current corps members. Both have incredible school leaders that both challenge and support their staff to be the best they can be.
That means a decision is in order.....
Stay tuned.
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